Don't know what came over me today. Made bacon and cabbage with champ and soda bread and had the kids rolling their eyes at me. They also did the twirly fingers at the head bit so I made them listen to Microdisney and Fatima Mansions.
For afters they had The Pixies.
They all wanted seconds. Nothing better sham!
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Zeitgeist Funf
Berlin-Magdalenenstraße U-Bahn
The Socialist-Realist overload left me wanting a bit of 'fresh' air and so I went for a wander around the neighbourhood. This seemed to need approval for a passing burst of torrential rain sent me scuttling for cover in the U-Bahn. Even the weather was an 'unofficial collaborator' that day.
Now as I had booked a hotel in advance and was paying with hard currency I was supposed to have been exempt from the daily currency exchange requirement. I got precisely nowhere trying to explain that to heavily armed civil servants ( or should that be People's Representatives) as I got off the train at Lichtenberg and had to change some cash at the 'official' East German rate of one Westmark to one DDR Mark. It was robbery as the unofficial rate at the time was about 6 or 7 to 1 and a little hard currency could go a long way. This was just as well because that's all I had. A little.
Once on the train I followed my bizarre Stadtplan that made no reference to West Berlin. As far as the Comrades were concerned they lived in Berlin and as there was no West Berlin there could be no East Berlin. To them the city's western boundary was the 'Anti-Fascist Protection Measure' that the rest of the world called the Wall. Looking back it's easy to snort at the madness of it all but in 1989 with that Stalinist fuckbake Honecker running the gulag it wasn't hard to imagine East Germany leading hard-line Communism into the 21st Century. Even the Soviets had all but given it up by that time and were being denounced by Honecker's mob as being too weak-willed and decadent to lead the revolution.
I wasn't thinking this at the time of course. I was too busy being stared at way more than usual. I was getting a bit bristly to say the least and I'm glad my stop was a short way along Frankfurter Allee. I know I was in a police state after all but I had to draw the line at being spied on by acid denim clad legions with bad mullets and Freddy Mercury moustaches.
The Socialist-Realist overload left me wanting a bit of 'fresh' air and so I went for a wander around the neighbourhood. This seemed to need approval for a passing burst of torrential rain sent me scuttling for cover in the U-Bahn. Even the weather was an 'unofficial collaborator' that day.
Now as I had booked a hotel in advance and was paying with hard currency I was supposed to have been exempt from the daily currency exchange requirement. I got precisely nowhere trying to explain that to heavily armed civil servants ( or should that be People's Representatives) as I got off the train at Lichtenberg and had to change some cash at the 'official' East German rate of one Westmark to one DDR Mark. It was robbery as the unofficial rate at the time was about 6 or 7 to 1 and a little hard currency could go a long way. This was just as well because that's all I had. A little.
Once on the train I followed my bizarre Stadtplan that made no reference to West Berlin. As far as the Comrades were concerned they lived in Berlin and as there was no West Berlin there could be no East Berlin. To them the city's western boundary was the 'Anti-Fascist Protection Measure' that the rest of the world called the Wall. Looking back it's easy to snort at the madness of it all but in 1989 with that Stalinist fuckbake Honecker running the gulag it wasn't hard to imagine East Germany leading hard-line Communism into the 21st Century. Even the Soviets had all but given it up by that time and were being denounced by Honecker's mob as being too weak-willed and decadent to lead the revolution.
I wasn't thinking this at the time of course. I was too busy being stared at way more than usual. I was getting a bit bristly to say the least and I'm glad my stop was a short way along Frankfurter Allee. I know I was in a police state after all but I had to draw the line at being spied on by acid denim clad legions with bad mullets and Freddy Mercury moustaches.
Monday, May 25, 2009
How Dull It Is To Pause, To Make An End.
We have adventuring to be getting on with.
No matter how much I moan and groan about it I actually have a pretty good life here in America. Not perfect by any means and somewhat prone to some serious changes in circumstance and station from time to time but broadly speaking I lead a decent existence. Now wait a week and see what fresh disaster falls upon me.
That's next week though. For now I am rested and sated after a fine Memorial Day week-end. The highlight being my friend Kevin's 40th birthday party yesterday. Instead of a fancy restaurant and overpriced cocktails there was a barbecue set up on the cul-de-sac , huge coolers filled with (quality)ice-cold beer, kiddie pools (and plenty of kids tearing around the place) and a wagon load of Kevin's friends and neighbours.
There were youngfellas playing football in the street, toddlers diving into the kiddie pools with their clothes on and kids whipping down the street in pedal cars and other things with wheels. Our three were avid participants in all of the above. Communal parenting and the street being ,in effect, blocked off ensured no real harm could come to them. All of this under fine weather and to a Style Council soundtrack.
Kids ran until they dropped from their happy efforts. Adults not too far behind them. I ended the night drinking good beer under the stars trading salvoes of poetry with a literary gent who had me on the ropes with an A.E. Housman combination. A desperate ragged broadside of Tennyson in reply was barely enough to salvage the point. He was gallant enough not to press home his advantage and obliterate my untutored arse.
It was a good day. An ordinary day made beautiful with friendship, affection and laughter and the stirrings of expectation that there can be more days just like this. I know that it can seem odd to aspire to ordinary joys but even these were beyond my reach not so long ago.
Not anymore though. This I can do.
No matter how much I moan and groan about it I actually have a pretty good life here in America. Not perfect by any means and somewhat prone to some serious changes in circumstance and station from time to time but broadly speaking I lead a decent existence. Now wait a week and see what fresh disaster falls upon me.
That's next week though. For now I am rested and sated after a fine Memorial Day week-end. The highlight being my friend Kevin's 40th birthday party yesterday. Instead of a fancy restaurant and overpriced cocktails there was a barbecue set up on the cul-de-sac , huge coolers filled with (quality)ice-cold beer, kiddie pools (and plenty of kids tearing around the place) and a wagon load of Kevin's friends and neighbours.
There were youngfellas playing football in the street, toddlers diving into the kiddie pools with their clothes on and kids whipping down the street in pedal cars and other things with wheels. Our three were avid participants in all of the above. Communal parenting and the street being ,in effect, blocked off ensured no real harm could come to them. All of this under fine weather and to a Style Council soundtrack.
Kids ran until they dropped from their happy efforts. Adults not too far behind them. I ended the night drinking good beer under the stars trading salvoes of poetry with a literary gent who had me on the ropes with an A.E. Housman combination. A desperate ragged broadside of Tennyson in reply was barely enough to salvage the point. He was gallant enough not to press home his advantage and obliterate my untutored arse.
It was a good day. An ordinary day made beautiful with friendship, affection and laughter and the stirrings of expectation that there can be more days just like this. I know that it can seem odd to aspire to ordinary joys but even these were beyond my reach not so long ago.
Not anymore though. This I can do.
Friday, May 08, 2009
Monday, May 04, 2009
Small Mercies
Given how I feel tonight I'm grateful it rained all day.
In fact I hope it never stops raining.
Sunshine today would have been an obscenity.
End Of Message.
Update.
Feeling much better now.
Thank you all for the support. It was needed and appreciated.
X
In fact I hope it never stops raining.
Sunshine today would have been an obscenity.
End Of Message.
Update.
Feeling much better now.
Thank you all for the support. It was needed and appreciated.
X
Zeitgeist Vier
Berlin-Lichtenberg
East Berlin swallowed all colour. Even the sun fled over the Wall as soon as it could. You got the impression that the DDR really resented the star's undocumented coming and going. Earlier(after a nerve twanging quarter hour) my passport had been returned to me by the brisk Lt.Gruber. I was grudgingly admitted to the Worker's Paradise for 72 hours. They weren't done yet though. I was relieved of my trusty Kodak Instamatic and issued with a receipt. I was nonchalantly informed that my camera would be returned to me at my hotel. There was the slightest hint of a smirk as if he was expecting an objection.
I had just spent a while without my passport on the wrong side of the Iron Curtain. The point had been made Comrade.
The rest of the trip was uneventful and my insomnia was miraculously cured by the arrival of a pair of English gastronauts at Dresden. Nice enough people but my cavalier approach to fine dining (I had black bread,cheese,sausage and beer for about 90% of meals) put a barrier between us. Once the stress of the border was over with the weariness descended upon me and I slid back into feeling sorry for myself. Every passing moment took me further from her and closer to an uncertain future. I stared out the window at seemingly endless forest and fell into that wearying,fitful half sleep you drift in and out of on trains.
The train slowed as we passed through Berlin's South-East suburbs. I thought the day had ended prematurely but it was only the city doing it's best to deny the existence of colours other than grey. Becoming fully concious did not improve the scenery. Massive,older apartment buildings vied for ugliness with newer Soviet-"inspired"blocks on streets wider than anything I'd seen before. Battle damage competed with shoddy construction and pollution to join with deserted streets in presenting me with a grim vista. The unrelenting dourness of it would wither you. A Moyross childhood gave me a higher tolerance though.
Admittedly I didn't come to these conclusions on the train that day. They all took shape during my brief, sad time there but the initial impressions were not improved upon. Impressions that matched the bleak realm of my heart entirely.
Prussian granite and rain welcomed me to Berlin.
East Berlin swallowed all colour. Even the sun fled over the Wall as soon as it could. You got the impression that the DDR really resented the star's undocumented coming and going. Earlier(after a nerve twanging quarter hour) my passport had been returned to me by the brisk Lt.Gruber. I was grudgingly admitted to the Worker's Paradise for 72 hours. They weren't done yet though. I was relieved of my trusty Kodak Instamatic and issued with a receipt. I was nonchalantly informed that my camera would be returned to me at my hotel. There was the slightest hint of a smirk as if he was expecting an objection.
I had just spent a while without my passport on the wrong side of the Iron Curtain. The point had been made Comrade.
The rest of the trip was uneventful and my insomnia was miraculously cured by the arrival of a pair of English gastronauts at Dresden. Nice enough people but my cavalier approach to fine dining (I had black bread,cheese,sausage and beer for about 90% of meals) put a barrier between us. Once the stress of the border was over with the weariness descended upon me and I slid back into feeling sorry for myself. Every passing moment took me further from her and closer to an uncertain future. I stared out the window at seemingly endless forest and fell into that wearying,fitful half sleep you drift in and out of on trains.
The train slowed as we passed through Berlin's South-East suburbs. I thought the day had ended prematurely but it was only the city doing it's best to deny the existence of colours other than grey. Becoming fully concious did not improve the scenery. Massive,older apartment buildings vied for ugliness with newer Soviet-"inspired"blocks on streets wider than anything I'd seen before. Battle damage competed with shoddy construction and pollution to join with deserted streets in presenting me with a grim vista. The unrelenting dourness of it would wither you. A Moyross childhood gave me a higher tolerance though.
Admittedly I didn't come to these conclusions on the train that day. They all took shape during my brief, sad time there but the initial impressions were not improved upon. Impressions that matched the bleak realm of my heart entirely.
Prussian granite and rain welcomed me to Berlin.
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